Everybody dance now!

For my dance dance revolution class, my group is charged with creating an aerobics routine. We decided on a “Cotton Eye Joe” remix aimed towards little kids. My idea of “Let’s get Physical” for little kids was quickly shot down.

Here is the breakdown of my “family” as Dr. Dansby calls it. It sounds a bit cultic. So there’s J-Master Funk, Jenna. Jenna is typically a bubbly, outgoing, assertive girl whose Type A (more like Type Gay amirite?) personality gets on my nerves. Somehow we’ve become fairly close friends over the past year, however. She has always had a bit of a sarcastic streak, but it really manifests itself once she’s caught in a situation she doesn’t like and has no control over. Aerobics is such a situation. She grumps around for the entire class, second-guessing why she ever took it in the first place, and damning everybody to a fiery pit of anti-dance. She laughs at everybody who looks ridiculous, while I guess overlooking herself in the mirror. She’s a hoot to aerobicize next to.

Secondly is Bailey. She’s a double major in art and dance. That’s basically a double major in “would you like fries with that?” and “no, sir, I won’t do that for that cheap.” She wants to dance professionally. I’m sure sure if getting paid in only one dollar bills makes you a professional or not. She’s seems to be a very sweet girl. She still has the idealism of a freshman, innocent expressions and comments—the kind of person you want to protect. I’m sure somebody does, anyways. She is always sure to aerobicize right next to Dr. Dansby at the front of the class. I don’t even think it’s to suck up; I think it’s because she likes the class so much that she doesn’t want to be sure to be within sweating distance of Dansby in order to make sure she doesn’t miss anything. Having her in our group is definitely a benefit.

Next is Kelly. Kelly is a guy. Kelly weights about 130 lbs.

Lastly is me, Rob the Dawg. I am awesome and will be teaching the class by the end of the semester. My favorite dance is The Raptor. The endz.

Oh, here is a picture of me breakdancing.

Rob dancing upon injustice

But I’m White!

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Tonight was the third time in about a month I have been “pulled over” while walking. Little did I know that something as innocuous as putting one foot in front of the other as a means of transportation makes you an international terrorist. Here’s the scenario…

It was about nine thirty this evening, and I was walking along the stretch of sidewalk that leads from 16^th St. to campus. It literally takes maybe five minutes to get to my house to campus, quick enough to stay out of the Johnny Law’s long reach around. The neighborhood consists of college kids, young families, and me, Rob, the guy who spits a loogey in the law’s all-seeing, all-knowing face with his deviant behavior. I had just passed 15^th st. when a cop speeds past me. I didn’t think anything of it until he dramatically screeches to a halt and doughnuts his way back around. Going around the block or turning around in somebody’s driveway would have given me too much time to make my daring escape. Yeah, maybe if I was riding on the back of Usain Bolt. So the cop makes a big Cops-esque scene to chase me down. Once he catches back up (I was ten feet away), he shined his Mcmassive light in my eyes. This was to kill me in case I was a vampire (vampyre for the 19^th century readers). With light still on me, he opens his car door and hikes up his pants.

Out of the car comes a five foot five tall man of super douche with small-man syndrome. He asks me for some identification. I reach for my wallet and hand it over with compliance. He looks at it and asks me where I was headed. I tell him, again, compliantly. As he starts to hand me back my id, I ask “I did nothing wrong, why did you ‘pull me over’?” (I used sarcasm quotes for real). “This is the third time this has happened in the past month, and I’m starting to think it’s arbitrary, targeted towards people who walk, and a violation of my civil liberties.” He sighed and pulled back his reach, along with my id. “Why I pulled you over is none of your concern, and I don’t appreciate being disrespected.” I bit back, “but it is my business! If I was in a car, you wouldn’t randomly pull me over without telling me. Do you have any idea how many upset drivers there would be? It’s nine thirty on a Wednesday night, and I am clearly headed towards campus. If I was driving to campus, it wouldn’t be a problem. And it’s a problem because you haven’t told me why we’re even in this situation, and you just asked for my identification. If I’ve given you probable cause to search me, you are more than welcome to take me ‘down town’ (sarcasm quotes) so you would have to submit to habeas corpus , but otherwise, I’d really appreciate it if you’d give me back my wallet.” The officer handed me back my wallet. “Sir, the only reason I’m not going to do anything about this is because I am in a hurry, but next time you need to be more respectful of an officer, and things will go more smoothly.” He walked off.

I acted inappropriately, maybe, but police officers have no right to have free reign like that. I did nothing wrong; it wasn’t even past the midnight curfew intended for the under-eighteen crowd. I would have been given back my wallet originally had I just kept my mouth shut, but it was the principle of having unwarranted searches and questions. The whole scenario was ludicrous. He both spoke politely to one another, and neither of our voices were raised. Allowing emotions to interfere with my words would have been a very bad idea.

I walked over the BSU to tell the tale of racially profiled white male…and watch U2’s ZooTv concert.

P.S. Hoped this helped, Tiffany.

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The summer break is over, and school is here. I don’t really want to linearly hash things that have passed since the last time I have posted, simply because it would be too tedious and hardly eventful. Just imagine I posted yesterday.

The summer can be personally defined as a religious struggle for me. It’s the way summers go—struggles, an in-between crossing point, a paradox from the school year. The last time I went through a funk this bad was the summer after my freshman year. This led to an angry diatribe in the form of a blog on Christianity as attacks from everywhere hit me. I almost abandoned my faith. I grew more that summer than any other time. And so on. This summer was more of the same. My own personal, sardonic motto of the summer was, “religion is the most clever invention of mankind.” And so on. I was so angry about so many things, and this manifested itself through every facet of my life in many simple ways. And then I got angry about how angry and jagged I had become. I began to hate Christianity while still believing that Jesus is the Son of God, that he became sin, and then rose from the dead for us and our salvation.

Then it stopped. Maybe it’s been the hundreds of miles on a bicycle, going to-and-fro on Highway 3, never ceasing to be amazed when the beauty of the scenery jumped out at me unexpectedly. Maybe that was it. Perhaps the hours walked through “downtown” Ada, even with people honking at how slow or inconvenient I am. I have seen God in so many small things. Romans 1:20, much? Noticing God through people, instead of noticing sin through people. Just learning to be thankful in all circumstances. Learning to ignore people, even close friends. Some of the people who hate judgment the most are the most condemning I have noticed. I would hate to think I was so fickle, able to oscillate back and forth based on mere circumstances.

And you know what, I have had to start over, anew, on a lot of things. My discipline in high school? It’s gone. Instead of just telling myself, “this is just a valley” I admitted to myself that I have changed so much from my chubby Rob days of extreme shyness and over-the-top analysis. So instead of trying to repeat who I was, it is time to be honest and try to understand who I am now, what I believe in now, and what I want. And so on.

I have done a lot of sinnin’ the summer…A LOT! And not just the conventional stuff, either; it’s the stuff that makes for good confession; the stuff nobody else knows about. Instead of feeling guilt, I feel conviction. This is a much better feeling.

I have also learned that big words, phrases, terms don’t impress me in the least. Anybody with internet access can wikipedia their way to genius. I had a conversation with Jacob just the other day blew my mind. He’s reading seminary-level books on philosophy and apologetics and make my brain ’splode. Understanding infinity or the lack thereof. He’s also incredibly humble and does not make decisions easily. He’s honest in what he says, his doubts, and so on.

And

So

On

Proper sidewalk etiquette

This is a repost from 2006, but with the new crop of students coming up, it’s important to constantly remind people of how consequential sidewalk etiquette is…

All ECU veterans are well aware that the sidewalks of campus are mean and unforgiving. All it could take is one gesture or look that’s interpreted as hostile and you could end up sidewalk fodder for the custodian to clean up. That is why it is necessary to have an official document explaining proper sidewalk etiquette to all new students. We want to ensure safety as you walk from building to building. Keep these rules in mind as you walk past people on the busy sidewalks.

Stare past/around/at feet: I do not know you, and do not want to appear creepy. Alternate: I know you, but you have hurt my feelings in the past. Alternate: I know you, but we’ve done something that would make us feel awkward (e.g. make out). Alternate: I know you too vaguely to make eye contact.

Eye contact: I recognize you.

Upward jerk of chin: I took a class with you, or have met you once in some other capacity, but that’s as far as our connection goes.

Downward nod of the head: We are on speaking terms, but I don’t have time to stop and speak with you right now.

One wave of hand, waist level: Same as downward nod. Alternate: Same as double wave of hand, chest level on a busy day.

Double wave of hand, chest level: You’re a friend of a friend who I enjoy hanging out with in a group of friends.

More than two waves, chest level: Notice me! I know you well or I at least want to know you well. Alternate: I’m socially retarded.

Verbal exchange, short: I feel the need to be polite with you. No need to offend you by ignoring. Alternate: We’ve met in the last couple of days, but during that time we’ve hung out for at least a moderate length of time. Alternate: We’re in a class together, and I’m making small talk as we walk to different classes. Alternate: We’re in a class together, and I’m making small talk as we walk to different classes; I would like to ask you on a date but don’t know you well enough yet to do so. Alternate: We’re in a class together, and I’m making small talk as we walk to different classes; I think that I’d like to be your friend.

Verbal exchange, long: You are my friend. Alternate: You’ve pissed me off. Alternate: We’re reconciling. Alternate: We’re in a class group together, and we need to coordinate something.

Hug: meaningless; ambiguous; females use it in any and all contexts.

Kiss, short: We’re dating or will soon be. Alternate: We’re close friends with a lot of history behind us.

Kiss, long (with or without tongue): We’re dating or will soon be. Alternate: We’re close friends with a lot of history behind us. A lot. Alternate: We’re more or less acting out our immature fantasy of what college should be, full of meaningless making out.

Standing side by side, holding hands, on a grassy area, under the shade of the trees, surrounded by smiling friends: I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

Trendy

Throughout the summer, I have had the opportunity to get to know people I have seen around campus, seen around The Perfect Blend, and seen around the church scene. Last semester, I labeled the people The Trendies, a play on their church, Trinity Baptist Church (Trinity=Trendy). These people always have a camera or some other piece of equipment around their neck, have a huge crush on Apple, and are trendy in the sense that they are anti-trendy. A lot of them have very strong opinions and are passionate about them, but a lot of times it’s been very “no duh” kinds of opinions. They speak their opinions through their t-shirts and facebook groups. My intuition about people is usually spot on by just getting to know somebody on surface level, and this caused me to generalize about an entire group of people. Some of my friends past and present have had a bitter taste in their mouth of the Trinity college group, causing further apprehension. Fortunately I have been able to get to know a few of the guys from the group just through laissez-faire conversation. I have found that they are quite amiable. More than that, they can be very engaging in good conversation. I like to ask a lot of questions, partially because it takes the pressure of conversation off of me (social psychology trick- always ask questions about the person and subtly stroke their ego by asking for their opinions) without them noticing. This is allowed me to gain better clarity and understanding.

Jared is probably one of the humblest individuals I have met, yet he still believes he is arrogant. He is what I call a popular nerd. He knows when “comic book day” (the day new comics come in) is at the local store, for example, and has a crush on Stan Lee. He is very well read and always takes people seriously and treats them with respect. He doesn’t bull crap around or walk with an undeserved sense of entitlement. It might be because I don’t know him very well, but when things don’t go his way, his disposition remains sunny. He doesn’t have the funds for graduate school at the moment, for example, and other than “being bummed”, he seems to understand that at this moment and time, he still have a great purpose in his life.

His brother, Garret, is somebody I only talk to on occasion. He is very opposite of Jared in a lot of ways. He hates to read, and looks like the kind of guy that is about to go the beach with a lady on each arm. He tends to talk a lot and has a certain charm about him. At first this makes him appear fake and self-centered, but this is far from the truth. He cares very deeply for other people and is surprisingly idealistic, though I don’t think he even picks up on it. He is also a pretty humble guy but isn’t afraid to speak up whenever his morals have been violated.

Jesse is my house mate whom I have known since freshman year. We’ve always gotten along pretty well without having much in common. His faith has a big effect on him. He grew up in a very Christian home, his father a music minister. When a lot of people get burnt out, Jesse remains steadfast. People tend to see him as a little uptight and a little too set in his ways. I think this is because he is always on the move with some idea or goal, either personally or for an organization he is working with. He also has good taste in beer.

Lastly, there’s the head cheese in charge of the college ministry, Chris. I have heard nothing but horrible things about him from his “rivals” since I was a freshman. I have heard that his sermons are shallow and devoid of theological thought. He is arrogant and unwilling to work with anybody and will automatically resist anybody who contradicts him. I will admit, the man has a very strong personality. It is easy to see why people think he is full of himself, but it is a stretch to say arrogant. If he doesn’t know something, he is willing to ask, and will even ask for opinions on a subject. He has been very helpful to me when discussing bikes (he is a former triathlete). He is not a very typical Southern Baptist minister. Though he didn’t use the terminology, he was talking like a partial preterist the other day. He also has Calvinist sympathies. His crushes include N.T. Wright and John Macarthur. He is quite the visionary. Once he has an idea in his mind, he works it until completion. He set up a very affective council/ministry team. He utilizes their individual personalities and gifts to the advantage of getting what is needed done. His weapon of choice might just be sarcasm, but it’s hard to say. He has said things that were either snide comments or completely harmless. I tend to think the latter because he is usually so direct about things.

Trinity will be one of the churches I hop to after school starts. They have a service called The Ten that will start the Sunday before class beings. It will meet at The Source. Jared is thinking about adding elements of liturgy to it, which interests me even more.